Hot Wings Challenge

I found myself this Friday night at Urge Gastropub — a great restaurant with a fantastic beer list — for their 4th anniversary celebration. As part of their special menu for the night was the “Pucker butt wings.”  While their name isn’t very memorable, their effect on your body most definitely is. These wings were covered with a sauce made from the 4 hottest peppers on the planet: the Carolina Reaper, Moruga Scorpion, Trinidad Butch T Scorpion, and the famous Ghost Pepper. With names like those (“Butch T”??) you know Mother Nature ain’t messing around.

In our group of 10, only 3 of us were courageous enough to order them; the rest of the table was much more level-headed. Shortly afterwards our waitress brought us each a waiver to sign. We happily signed it — like a dope I signed it as if I were signing an official hospital document: with date and time — and waited for the plate of wings to arrive.

And soon a plate full of 9 sauce-soaked wings with an extra drizzle of sauce landed in front of us. Here I am at the start, still happy and enjoying life. Note the gloves, which a friend provided and proved to be a very valuable accessory.

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Happiness quickly turned to pain…and sadness…and panic. Admittedly the first few wings were tasty, but then the burn sunk in and it was an intense heat like nothing I’ve ever experienced. My tongue and face both felt like they wanted to burst with fire. I kept sticking out my tongue in an attempt to cool it but that was pointless. Sips and gulps of beer didn’t help at all, and neither did getting up and pacing around the room. My eyes started tearing up and my nose started pouring out its own fluid…all of which Sally had to wipe away for me periodically. A quick glance around the room revealed the other two guys were equally suffering.

I was only halfway done and almost ready to to call it quits when I received a blessing: a glass of milk delivered by our waitress. Milk typically hasn’t helped me much in the past with spicy foods, but then again I’ve never tasted spice like this. That cool milk coated and soothed my tongue and was the only thing that allowed me finish off all 9 wings.

A slow and painful ten minutes later the wings were finished but the aftermath was only beginning. My lips and tongue continued to tingle for hours, and soon the rest of my GI tract started churning. Unfortunately — but as expected — 12 hours later the wings took out their biggest revenge on me: basement fire. (And that’s a fire that I couldn’t put out for a full day.) Despite all that, I’m looking forward to participating again next year.

I edited a short (1:30) video of my suffering. Watch, and experience the pain with me.

Introducing Iceland (and Greenland)

Welcome back, peoples! Despite my efforts to stay local and domestic this year, I succumbed to the travel bug and booked a last-minute flight to Iceland.

Why Iceland? Mostly because I spun an e-globe (i.e. Google Maps), closed my eyes, and dropped a finger down on a random country. I don’t know much about the country — until today I didn’t even know what language they spoke (Icelandic) — but it definitely seems like a land where modern civilization meets kingdoms of previous eras, when vikings ruled the world and elves ran around freely. It’s full of natural wonders such as volcanoes, geysers, thermal baths, fjords, and more. It’s also full of interesting and long names such as Reykjavik, Kerlingarfjoll, Eyjafjallajokull, and Aflugennugenblugen. (I may have made up one of those names.)

I will be traveling once again with Rubin — a friend from medical school who I went to South America and also took a bromance trip with — and our itinerary includes flying into Reyjkavik, Iceland and spending a few days there exploring scenery, visiting castles, eating herring, and similar things. We also decided to hop over to Greenland and see what that country has to offer. As of now, all I know is that Iceland is green and Greenland is ice. Let’s see how true that is.

I’m taking a ridiculous amount of technology with me, including my iPhone, iPad, Canon Powershot camera, and GoPro video camera. Also I’ve packed an odd collection of clothes and items, including thermal underwear, scarves, and gloves (for cold weather) and swimsuit and snorkel gear (for warm weather…I hope).

That’s it for now. See you on the other side.

Travel Journal: Iceland 1

Halló from Iceland! First off, why didn’t anyone let me know it’s cold here … I’m quite under prepared for the wind and cold weather here. It doesn’t help that I forgot those thermal underwear I mentioned earlier, because my bits are freezing. It also doesn’t help that the locals love to announce “Reykjavik is so warm this time of year.”

Thermal baths
Iceland is full of volcanos and people who love to swim (Reykjavikurs went swimming an average of 15 times last year)…so what better way to combine the two than with geothermal baths. The water in these pools are warmed by volcanic flow, keeping them around 30 degrees C.

As my first activity in this country I visited Laugardalslaug, the largest pools in Iceland, including several Olympic sized ones as well as multiple “hot pots” (essentially jacuzzis, with extra hot water being pumped in.)

Icelanders are very particular about tourists being dirty and thus everyone is required to shower before entering the pools. No big deal, but then I saw this sign:

Great. Not only do they want you clean but they want your swimsuit clean too, but separately from your body. Reluctantly I stripped down and walked into the shower area while — and here’s the best part — some teenage kid on a power trip watched us all to make sure we were showering properly. I’m pretty sure that is how they do it in prison.

In any case, I actually went on to have a great swim followed by a long sit in their hot pots, kept at very toasty 42 degrees.  I was so jet lagged I almost fell asleep several times. Overall, except for the fact that I paid money to shower naked with other men, it was a great experience.

Quad tour
A unique way to experience the more natural parts of Reykjavik is with a quad (or ATV as I thought they were called.) We took a quad tour at nighttime of the city and its outskirts, riding through mountains, dirt roads, and shallow rivers. These 4-wheeled beasts were much bigger than I thought, and we took them to nearly 60 mph (100 kph if you’re European.)

I was already a bit apprehensive because of all the injury horror stories I’ve heard they cause, but I ended up feeling much safer than expected.

What certainly is not safe is driving with only one hand.

By the way, these shots were all taken around 11pm at night.

Geysers
One of Iceland’s most famous attractions is Geysir, the natural hot water spout after which all others in the world are named (i.e. “geysers”). Geysir is the grand daddy of them all but unfortunately stopped erupting in the 1950s after tourists threw rocks in there and clogged him up. This is poor Geysir today:

Luckily, just down the road is Strokkur, probably the world’s most reliable geyser. She erupts consistently every 8-10 minutes and really is an exciting sight to see.

Travel Journal: Greenland

Today was … memorable. Air Iceland offers day trips from Reykjavik to Greenland, and since it’s unlikely I’ll be in the region again soon, I figured why not visit an extra country (interestingly, Greenland is not entirely independent but rather part of the Kingdom of Denmark.) Specifically we would visit Kulusuk, a small village with no flushing toilets populated by only 200 residents who are Inuits. We boarded our plane and two hours later landed in the faraway village. We were filled with excitement and hope.

We were met by our guide Johann, a Danish man with graduate school education in anthropology living part of the year in Greenland and the rest in Iceland, who led us on our hike from the airport to the village. After an hour of walking and hearing interesting history about the region, Kulusuk — with its brightly colored wood houses — became visible. A bit barren, but we were still intrigued at this point.

How quickly our minds changed. A few hours here convinced us that this small village was perhaps the most depressing community we had ever experienced. The village was essentially a ghost town, with no signs of anyone trying to make a living or wanting to have purpose. And none of the residents appeared to be interested in preserving any aspect of their culture, from their village (covered with filth) to their identity (most were unemployed due to poor work ethic) to even their own health (significant alcohol abuse and more).

It was so depressing it became comical. The only thing we could do to keep us from losing our sanity was make fun of the situation. To more accurately describe our visit there, I will now contrast what our tour itinerary promised with a more realistic itinerary … based on what we actually experienced.

—–

Your guide will escort you from the airport to the engaging village Kulusuk…

Your guide will lead you on a hike through rocky hills instead of the flatter main road (and say “but if I had Chinese people in my group I’d use the easy roads.”) You will then reach a village littered with trash and where inbreeding runs rampant.

…where you can stroll about and meet some of the 250 local residents and view their quality crafts.

You will see at most 15 local and probably drunk residents, including a man who’s lived in the village for 32 years but was so drunk he couldn’t remember half of it, and “Mrs Unfaithful”, the town prostitute who everyone — except her husband — knows is pregnant.

You’ll be treated to kayaking demonstrations and an ancient drum dance reflective of the indigenous culture.

They will drag a really old kayak out of a shed and show it to you for 5 minutes. You won’t get a drum/dance show but you will see the dance hall where performances used to be held.

On your return flight to Reykjavík you enjoy a spectacular view over huge glaciers and floating icebergs.

Your guide will charge you an extra $30 then throw you on a little boat filled with guns, going 1 mph (but, you will see icebergs!)

You will also receive a certificate of visit.

You will be treated to a day-old hot dog that you have to pay for yourself.

Lunch or refreshments are not included.

At least they got one thing right.

—–

Admittedly I’m being somewhat harsh, and I am certain Greenland has much beautiful scenery and unique activities; Kulusuk was just not the place to experience them. I would happily return to other parts of this country especially as part of a trip to the Arctic. Until then, this is one passport stamp that was quite painful to earn.

Travel Journal: Iceland 2

Three unique outdoor adventures and two unusual food adventures. Read on…

Inside the volcano
I took a journey toward the center of the earth by descending deep into a dormant volcano. The Thrihnukagigur volcano last erupted 4000 years ago and for some reason left behind a magma chamber that is completely hollowed out (they explained why but I couldn’t follow along; I barely know what magma is.)

We hiked 45 minutes in the great outdoors to reach the entrance of the volcano. There is only one way to enter the volcano and that’s through a very narrow crater at the top:

Using an elevator similar to a window washer’s elevator for high rise buildings, we descended 120m down to the floor of the volcano. It was a bit claustrophobic at times but overall ok.  This cartoon puts into perspective how deep the crater (and we) go down:

Seven minutes later we reached the bottom. It was fascinating down there, with a very interesting array of colors on the rock walls, a tiny pinhole of sunlight from the crater opening far above our heads, and the enormous size of the volcanic chamber inside.

If you ever come to Iceland, do this.

Scuba diving
Scuba diving typically isn’t an activity that people — including myself — associate with Iceland. However, I discovered  that not only is diving possible here, but it offers several things not found anywhere else in the world.

We went diving in the Silfra fissures, which is notable because 1) it’s in the Thingvellir National Park, which is where Game of Thrones is filmed, 2) it’s where the world’s oldest parliament was first created, and most interestingly 3) it’s where the continents of North America and Europe meet. Specifically it’s where the North American and Eurasian tectonic plates meet. (If I understand this correctly, continents are the parts of the plates that rise above the ocean; this graphic describes it better.)

As you might guess, the water temperature is close to freezing (about 3 degrees C). But this extreme cold allows for some of the clearest and most pristine waters on the planet.

Surviving such a cold water dive required a dry suit, which I had never worn before. I thought wetsuits were heavy, but that’s nothing compared to what we wore: a layer of thermal underwear (I was forced to buy some here), followed by a thick fleece undersuit (a fleece onesie), and finally the thick neoprene drysuit itself. Over all that we had extra weights (16kg!) and then the usual gear. It was nearly impossible to move. I became so hot walking around I couldn’t wait to jump in the water. But I did … and it was cold … so cold. The only semi-exposed body parts while wearing a dry suit are your wrists and your face, and I really thought they would develop frostbite.

In the end, though, it was all worth it because the views were phenomenal. There was easily >100m of visibility in that clear blue water. Although there was no marine life, there were plenty of interesting things to look at. Here I am touching both North America (right side of photo) and Europe (left).

A typical view throughout the dive.

The experience was well worth it and highly recommend it to any diver who finds themself in this part of the planet.

Hot springs
Iceland is full of volcanic activity, which means there are lots of active geothermal fields. We visited a popular one in the city of Hveragerdi, which involved a very arduous and very uphill 5km hike through endless steaming and stinky sulphur holes and green mountains as far as the eye can see.

Amazingly we did eventually make it there after two hours and were rewarded by a warm river that we relaxed in for a long time.

Hot dogs
It turns out Icelanders love hot dogs. They are cheap and you can find them everywhere. If you see a line of people in this city, chances are they’re lining up for a pylsur, or hot dog.

I hunted down Bæjarins beztu, a very simple hot dog stand that allegedly makes the best dogs in the country. There’s always a line in front of this stand waiting to get “one with everything” (a dog with ketchup, mustard, a special sauce, and fried onions.)

It’s been a long time since I’ve had a hot dog, so while I don’t have much to compare to, it really was tasty. Made of beef, pork, and lamb, it actually tasted like real meat and best of all it had a great snap when you bit into it. Bill Clinton even ate here multiple times whenever he visited.

(This is now the second place I’ve visited that Bill liked. Hopefully my heart doesn’t follow in his footsteps too.)

Fresh meat
I did something I’m not proud of tonight. I ate Iceland’s two most well-known wildlife animals: whale and puffin. Each is somewhat of a delicacy here and I figured when in Rome … why not?

The puffin was smoked and thus not tasty at all; I dislike all things smoked. Whale meat was interesting. It was (very) red meat but had a texture and taste more like fish. It didn’t taste bad but I felt guilty eating a fellow mammal. As a friend to the fishes, I felt so guilty that I returned home and went to WWF’s website and partially alleviated my guilty by adopting a whale. (Afterwards the website asked what prompted me to donate, and presented me with a list of options like TV ad, word of mouth, etc. I looked for a “I ate one of your animals and felt bad” option but fortunately didn’t see one.)

Join me and adopt an endangered species too!

Travel Journal: Iceland 3

Back home, safe and sound. Iceland was a great country that would keep any outdoorsman busy for weeks. But beware to those who visit: Iceland is outrageously expensive. A bottle of beer cost $9, a bowl of soup was $15, and a pair of long john bottoms was $110. Hot dogs, on the other hand, are nice and cheap.

Here is a cheesy and short (2 min) movie I edited together, summarizing my activities there.

New York City 2014

Who needs international travel when there’s such an amazing city here in our own country. Work has brought me to New York City, a city that I’ve only visited a few nights total in my life, and this time I got to stay for several days. This city is so lively and so energetic, it’s hard to believe anyone would want to live elsewhere. Dare I say I may even like NY better than SF? To be determined.

I almost couldn’t contain my giddiness when I stepped out of my hotel and tried to absorb everything: crowds of people rushing by, high-rises covered with bright neon lights, streets filled with honking yellow cabs, and to top it off my fancy hotel has free internet … I love the internet! I may need a sedative.

radiocity

Here are some highlights from my short trip.

BAM! More like WEIRD!
I met my aunt and we took the subway to see a show at the Brooklyn Academy of Music. This is America’s oldest performing arts center, and we had tickets to watch The Source, a performance about Bradley Manning, the Army private who leaked tons of classified military documents to the public. He was arrested in 2013 after chatting online with various people who then ended up turning him in. The show’s concept was fascinating: voices would recite the hundreds of lines of online chats, Twitter posts, and actual leaked documents, and then synchronize it to music in this multimedia opera of sorts. Again, fascinating in theory …

bam2

… but terrible in implementation! This was the worst “artistic” piece I have ever experienced. The voices were processed and sounded so synthesized and robotic that it made Stephen Hawking sound sexy. The music was more of a random collection of dissonant electronic noises. If there are any Friends fans out there, it sounded like that terrible electronic music Ross performed in front of everyone. (Except tonight was worse: at least Ross’ performance lasted only a minute.) At first I thought I wasn’t sophisticated enough to appreciate it, but then I realized I’m the normal one here … it’s the show that was an hour and a half of auditory nonsense.

(If you don’t believe me, feel free to listen to some sound samples from the show and form your own opinion. Godspeed.)

Ramen
I love me some good noodles. Outside of Japan, there’s probably no better city to find an abundance of great bowls of ramen. In preparation for this trip I looked up the best ramen shops in the city and learned of Ippudo, which appeared on multiple lists. What luck, it was only a few blocks from my hotel. I snuck out of my conference at lunchtime and ran to the restaurant, only to see that even at lunch there was a line. But after a 30 minute wait, I was soon seated in front of a bowl of karaka-men, traditional tonkatsu (pork) broth with an added kick of spice paste and fragrant garlic oil.

ramen

My first sip of broth immediately reminded of the many bowls of ramen I ate in Japan. This is what ramen is supposed to taste like. The broth was the ideal combination of salty, rich, silky, and (for lack of a better word) porky. The noodles — homemade — were perfectly cooked and thin, and were all covered by a thin layer of the oil. I slurped that broth so quickly, I wanted to order another. Unfortunately I had to return to the conference. I am here to learn, after all.

Phall of Fame
Months ago I discovered an Indian curry called phaal which is considered the world’s spiciest curry. It is typically made with at least 10 different types of chilies and peppers, and reportedly can bring down the toughest of eaters.

Soon thereafter I learned about the Brick Lane Curry House, an Indian restaurant that offers a phaal curry that they describe as “an excruciatingly hot curry, more pain and sweat than flavor. For our customers who do this on a dare, we will require you to state a verbal disclaimer not holding us liable for any physical or emotional damage after eating this curry.” And if you can finish their curry you will be rewarded with a free beer, a certificate of completion, and a spot on their “Phall of Fame.” Spicy food and recognition for eating it? Challenge accepted.

phallpre

I went there, I ordered it, I gave verbal consent, they double-checked I was serious, and once it arrived I looked at it … and it smelled atrocious. This black curry had the most potent smell and a taste that was even worse. It was certainly hot, but while it wasn’t quite as spicy as the hot wing challenge I did a few months ago, its horrendous taste made this experience much more painful. Honestly, it didn’t taste like food but more like ash. Burnt cigarette ashes. Halfway through, to keep myself from gagging, I needed to keep a piece of garlic naan in front of my nose to fool my taste buds as I shoveled down the remainder of the curry.

phallpost

A long 40 minutes later, I reached the bottom of the bowl. The two tables on either side of us cheered me on and when my free beer arrived I handed it over to one of them, as I couldn’t stomach the idea of insulting my stomach any more. As promised, I also received a certificate. I have never suffered so much for recognition.

certificate

I think it’s time I retire from this spicy food challenge business.

The Night of 3 Dinners
Time flew and all of a sudden my final night in NY was upon me. I had previously RSVP’ed to a work dinner at a nearby Italian restaurant, but I still hadn’t gotten my fill of NY’s unique food scene. My work dinner was at 730pm, so once the conference ended at 5pm I darted out to the streets and visited a falafel vendor I had been eyeing for days. Falafels are among my favorite foods and such stands aren’t found in San Diego, so with over two hours until dinner I wasn’t about to let it go to waste. Here’s the brief exchange I had with the falafel guy:

Me: How many falafels come in one order?
Him: How many do you want?
Me: I don’t know … 3?
Him: How about 8?
Me: OK.

A few hours later I went (with a full stomach) to the Italian restaurant, where I was let down by a duck ragu pasta dish that had sounded very promising.

Walking back to my hotel I was lamenting the fact that my last meal of the trip was a mediocre one, when I came across Totto Ramen. It was as if someone up above answered my silent food cries with my favorite food. It was nearly midnight, but I didn’t think twice about walking in to this tiny, cramped restaurant that consisted of nothing more than a single counter, and watched as they prepared bowl after bowl of their signature chicken — not pork — ramen. I looked over their menu and people, I am proud to tell you that I ordered the “spicy ramen” and not the “extra spicy ramen”. No need to be a hero tonight. (Plus, I was still sore from the previous night’s phaal.)

ramen2

Overall a fantastic trip to NY, and believe it or not I actually learned a lot too!

Welcome to Baseline Wander

Welcome!

This is my new platform for chronicling my adventures throughout the world. Stories come from nearby and faraway, sometimes involve adventure, and often focus on culinary escapades. If you’re not careful, you may even learn something here – typically because of my meticulous planning, but sometimes from very poorly-made decisions (I’m looking at you, Greenland).

Enjoy!

Around the World in 30 Days

Welcome back, peoples…get ready because this trip is a big one.

First of all, fellowship is done! After eight years of taking care of many thousands of patients, doing thousands of procedures, and sleeping hundreds of nights in the hospital, I’m finally done with my medical training. And not only did I convince a hospital into hiring me, they were generous enough to give me two months of vacation before starting my new job.

Taking full advantage of this significant time off, I’m taking a page from Jules Verne’s book and going around the world – maybe not in 80 days, but 30.

Itinerary

rtwmap3

Our trip begins in Cuba. The recent relaxing of travel restrictions allows people to visit – not for tourism, however, but for education-based trips. My brother and I will thus be participating in one of these.

We then continue to Italy, where we join up with our parents to explore several beautiful cities in the Tuscany region.

Finally, they return home as I continue on to Vietnam, a country I have been eager to visit since I first visited Southeast Asia years ago.

Of course, no trip is complete without me chewing off your ears about the local food. These countries all share in common great cuisine, and I can’t wait to stuff myself with red beans and rice, as well as slow-cooked pasta and wine, and then pho and other street foods. As always, food will be a major theme of the trip.

Oh, and communism too! Cuba and Vietnam are two of the five remaining communist countries in the world (the others being China, Laos, and North Korea), while Italy is a former communist country. Perhaps I should rename this trip to “Communism: Here’s Why it Doesn’t Work”.

Finally, as I am certain many of you will (again) ask me what I pack, this should satisfy you. Yes, that’s a cardiology book.

 IMG_4635

I embark upon this month-long journey tomorrow, so sit tight and see you on the other side.

Travel Journal: Miami

Happy 4th of July!

Most people celebrate 4th of July by eating apple pie and watching fireworks. I, on the other hand, chose to fly to a communist country that has minimal relations with America. After a rocky set of outbound flights — Delta adding an extra layover to my itinerary last minute, and then another flight taking off without me (I wasn’t happy about that one) — I landed in Miami to meet up with my brother. We went to the beach, only to realize we had each – independently, mind you – bought the exact same swim trunks.

We went home and never went to the beach together again.

Travel Journal: Cuba

Bienvenidos!

While our trade embargo with Cuba still remains in place, restrictions between the two countries have been eased so opportunities now exist to travel to Cuba legally. Tourism is still not permitted, but Americans can travel here via licensed educational exchange trips known as people-to-people tours. These are education-based trips that can only be offered by travel companies that have received a license from the Treasury Department’s Office of Foreign Assets Control – it’s all about the dollars. If you’re eager for more details, see 31 CFR § 515.565(b). And if you’re not down with the latest CFR §, it basically says go, but don’t deal too much with the Cuban Communist Party.

Arrival

The night before departing to Cuba there was an introductory meeting where we met our group, and thankfully no one seemed too annoying. The next morning we hopped on a chartered American Airlines flight, and 45 minutes later landed in Havana. I stepped off the plane onto the runway and took in a deep breath…it smelled ripe with communism. After a very painless checkout through passport control – where the most intrusive question they asked me was “Is this your passport?” to which I replied “Si” – we were ready to explore the country. (And no, that wasn’t Rosetta Stone talking…that’s 12 years of living in Southern California. What’s up.)

airport2

Initial Thoughts

Cuba is a poor country. The impact of both governmental control and the US embargo are noticeable everywhere. Infrastructure in Havana seems developed, but it’s very outdated and dilapidated – clearly a reflection of more prosperous years past. Also, whether a result of the communist regime or simple poverty, it seems there’s almost nowhere to spend money, both for tourists or locals. There aren’t many restaurants, I haven’t seen a single grocery store or corner market, and the one furniture store I saw was empty inside. This may be the first country I’ve visited where it may not be possible to live like a local. It doesn’t help that there are two currencies in Cuba: one for locals (pesos) and one for tourists (the CUC, pronounced “kooks”, or as I like to pronounce, “Cubans”.) Local establishments – if they actually exist – will accept either, but no tourist place will accept local pesos.

Finally, God forbid you forget about Fidel Castro or Che Guevara for even five minutes…their names and faces are everywhere.

cubascenes

Communism

As expected under communism, the government owns most businesses and services, such as hotels, restaurants, and entertainment. The country is actively working to improve its economy by privatizing many of these companies by local and foreign investors, and it was interesting to see common items being owned or produced or run by the government: sodas, nightclubs, clothing, etc. Cuban cola was essentially free; Coca-Cola cost was expensive.

A uniquely communist practice here in Cuba is that of rationing. Every Cuban citizen is given monthly rations, and everyone takes advantage of the program. Rice, beans, toilet paper, rum…most products needed for daily life are included. Old or young, every Cuban received rations their entire life, and the only thing adults got that children didn’t was coffee. Here was a typical ration store. It was far from glamorous, but it was effective.

rationstore

Rationing also affected us tourists in a very real way. Every day we would receive two bottles of water. And even though I toured harder than every other member of our group, I still only received two bottles. It’s tough being a communist.

Cigars

Cuba’s most well-known product and export is the cigar. Producing over 250 different kinds of cigars, Cuban cigars are considered by all to be the highest quality in the world. We had the opportunity to visit their main factory, La Corona. This factory, doesn’t produce just one brand of cigars, but all the top brands – including Cohiba, Montecristo, Romeo y Julieta, and H. Upmann.

And in what turned out to be my saddest moment of the trip, we were told there is a strict no photo policy inside the factory. Feel free to take pictures of their military, airport security, and police…but don’t dare photograph the cigar factory.

So allow me to paint a picture with words. The factory consisted of row after row of the most low-tech technology you could imagine: people sitting at small desks, pulling up one large tobacco leaf after another, and rolling it by hand. After these filler leaves were rolled together, they were put into molds on top of their desk where they were manually pressed for 30 minutes. Then a nicer, wrapper tobacco leaf was rolled around it, creating the final cigar. It was quite impressive watching a messy pile of brown leaves quickly turn into a nearly perfectly symmetric and sealed cigar before your eyes.

The cigar makers work from 7am-3pm daily, producing ~100 per day. On top of their pay they also received 5 free cigars a day. The factory prided themselves them on having a 65% female workforce, because “women are good at organization”.

Even though photos were prohibited, I managed to sneak this one of an empty part of the factory floor. The things I do for you, people…

factory

When in Cuba, do as the Cubans do. Here we are appreciating their finest. I didn’t cough (too much).

smoking

Rum

Cuba’s second famous product is rum. Most drinks contain it, and their main brand is Havana Club. And the way Morocco had mint tea and Brazil had caipirinhas, Cuba’s national drink is the mojito…a cocktail made with rum, mint, and sugar. It’s a tasty drink that goes down like water, and before you know it it’s mid-afternoon and you’ve already had 8.

Ernest Hemingway, the writer and America’s most well-known expatriate who lived in Cuba for much of his productive life, frequented the bar below for his favorite mojito in town.

mojitos

Vintage Cars

To visit Cuba today is to experience a country frozen in 1950. Most notable are their cars. The roads are filled with vintage American cars, including Chevys, Buicks, and Pontiacs from the 1920s-1950s. Most are meticulously maintained and brightly colored. Even better, many were used as taxis.

pinkcar

Our taxi one evening, in Revolution Plaza.

Around Havana

Our first day we visited the city cemetery, full of large mausoleums containing the remains of famous and ordinary Havana citizens. Cuban Barack Obama showed us around and pointed out the more popular tombs, including that of Ernest Hemingway’s bartender and Amelia, a woman whose baby survived some great catastrophe and nowadays people visit her tomb to have their wishes granted.

cemetary

We visited a local organization that acts as a community center for underserved youth to hone their creative skills and perform community service. Cuban Macy Gray charmed everyone with her voice.

macygray

Our final day we were treated to an amazing private show by the Havana Compass dance studio, a private dance company. They made amazing — and amazingly loud! — sounds with their drums, chairs, and sticks. Think of it as Cuban Stomp…but probably better.

compass

Earlier in the week, Cuban Morgan Freeman grabbed me on the street. I thought that was strange and then he put me in a headlock…which was even stranger. We had to give him 2 pesos before he let me go. Sadly no one got a photo of it.

Parting Thoughts

I arrived in Cuba ready to show them how great America is…they could finally learn about affordable healthcare, gay rights, and bald eagles. But after a few days there I learned that despite their terrible economy, Cubans are a remarkably upbeat and happy people. They’re kind and welcoming, and they’re also incredibly talented and passionate in all things artistic and musical (I’ve never heard so much great live music.) There’s certainly a lot we can learn from them. And who knew…they already have affordable healthcare!

As a visitor I never felt threatened roaming around town, even in the middle of the night. Cuba is one of the safest countries in the western hemisphere, and it certainly felt that way. Above all, there were essentially no beggars. Almost never was I approached by someone asking for money…very refreshing. (Hint, hint, Morocco.)

Some countries are communist but still successful, while others have US-imposed sanctions and are (moderately) successful. The combination, however, appears to be the kiss of death. Hopefully each of these aspects will be rectified in the near future and create better opportunities for the Cuban people to prosper.

passport

(By the way, because of this passport stamp, any time I re-enter the US in the future I need to show paperwork proving this visit to Cuba was in fact legal.)

Travel Journal: Siena

Benvenuti!

italy1

As a former medieval powerhouse, Siena is the first stop on our tour of Tuscany. Once upon a time (in the 1200s) it was Florence’s rival city, but after the black plague killed off many of its citizens, Florence permanently became the superior city. Still, Siena is still a great place to experience medieval life.

The narrow streets of Siena:

siena

At the heart of the city is Il Campo, a plaza in the center of the city that spreads outward and forms an amphitheater of sorts. Both locals and tourists gather here all day long, and it really becomes packed in the afternoons and evenings.

ilcampo

The highlight of Il Campo is the Palio horse races of the summer, where the 17 neighborhoods of Siena are each represented by one horse and rider in a no-holds barred horse race. While we missed the race by one week, we did see the celebration honoring the winning neighborhood. Il Campo quickly filled up with people our first night there, and we took a seat to watch the craziness unfold.

Different groups and schools and clubs rode by on floats, and at one point a large group of little children monks (or something like that) marched by. They thought it’d be fun to throw hard candy at the spectators, and one landed at our table. To return the favor I thought it’d be fun to throw one back at them, but when I did it accidentally hit one of the mini-monks in the face, who then fell down. Oops. You know what they say: when in Rome…um, take out one of the Romans? (Then make sure to get the heck out of Rome.)

palio

In the final moment of randomness, someone ran by and threw a piece of dry ice into my water.

Tuscan Food

“Farm to table” dining, such a fad at home, is the de facto culture here. All food is local and fresh, and the cuisine is always seasonal. The region’s specialty is wild boar (cinghiale) as is thick spaghetti known as pici, which pair well with each other. Other local specialties include all sorts of cured meats (salumi) and white truffles; upscale restaurants will offer this delicacy by shaving it directly above your pasta. Pricey yet tasty!

foodmontage2

By the way, peoples, the pasta photos on the bottom right nearly cost me my life, reputation, and dignity. I wandered into a small pasta shop and started snapping away pics of their exotic pastas. Immediately an angry Italian old man grabbed me and dragged me to another part of the store with a sign that said “No Foto”. I apologized in a mix of English and Spanish (I don’t know, I just did) and started walking out. At the entrance to his shop, just before kicking me out, he loudly and passionately scolded me in Italian, complete with angry hand gestures and probably lots of profanity. My dad accidentally walked into this mess too, and after our 5-minute royal chew out session was over, we both walked away with our heads down in shame…but secretly laughing under our breaths.

Shopping

My dad, brother, and I walked into a shoe store and ended up buying shoes…the same one. All three of us.

shoes

(I’m the skinny hairy one.)

This puts that whole Swim Trunk Fiasco to shame.

Travel Journal: Florence

Welcome to Florence, the cradle of the Renaissance and the cultural capital of Italy. Compared to Siena it’s a much bigger and more bustling city…and much hotter. There’s not a day that passes that I don’t soak my shirt in sweat. And I thought Cuba was bad.

Italian Fashion

People at home routinely mock my impeccable fashion sense. One person in particular, let’s call him Mitul – because, well, that’s his real name – likes to give me grief about the length of my pants, calling them too short. What’s the point of awesome socks if people can’t see them?

Anyway, within my first few minutes of arriving in Florence I saw this dapper guy:

shortpants

When the town floods, this guy will never need to worry about wet pant legs. I’ll now return back home with renewed confidence, and who knows…I may even let my ankles go commando too.

Uffizi

The Uffizi Gallery is the jewel of Florence’s cultural crown, full of Renaissance art. It is a huge U-shaped gallery on two floors, and it takes several hours to go through it all. Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and Raphael all have their works displayed here. The artists, not the ninja turtles.

Unfortunately, my knowledge and appreciation for art is limited, but I’ve included some of the more interesting pieces and what I feel their names should be:

“Disco Fever”

discofever

“I Should Photoshop His Face”

uglybaby

“Importance of Checking for Diabetic Foot Ulcers”

footulcers

And finally this one:

notmadonna

Why this painting? It’s not particularly well known, but after 100 paintings it was a refreshing change of subject material. After all, there’s a limit to how many portraits of Madonna, child, or Madonna and child I can handle…

David

We saw the world’s most famous naked man today. The statue David was created by Michelangelo between 1501 and 1504, and represents the biblical hero (as in David and Goliath.) We went to the Galleria dell’Accademia to view it, but after yesterday’s tiring journey inside the Uffizi, we wanted to go straight to the good stuff. Bypassing all other statues, we looked only for these signs:

davidsign

When we finally reached it, it really was incredible:

david

Photos never truly reveal the size of this great statue, which is close to 14 feet high. It’s actually quite amazing to think that this was created from a single piece of marble…a mediocre quality one that Michelangelo didn’t even select himself. Most impressive is the anatomic detail (especially considering how it was formed by chipping away with a hammer and chisel), in particular the veins on the back of the hands and arms.

daviddetails

The Uffizi gallery? Meh. But this was absolutely worth it.

No to Mafia

Walking down the street in Florence, I came across this:

mafia

I figured I should support them. In general it’s good to adopt a No On Mafia policy.

Favorite Italian Meal

Italian food…I’m sick of it. Really, I just can’t take another spaghettini alla this or pomodoro alla that. While Italian cuisine is tasty, I much prefer flavors that are more powerful and pungent (i.e. the foods I bring to work for my lunches everyday.)

Our last night in Italy, all of us felt the same. Thanks to a quick search online, we were able to eat the best meal of our trip to Italy: chicken tikka masala.

Travel Journal: Hanoi

Chào mừng! (I hope that means “welcome” in Vietnamese.)

Continuing eastward on my journey, I am now in Vietnam after a very lengthy 12-hour flight. I plan to explore the country from north (Hanoi) to south (Ho Chi Minh City), with plane, train, and automobile…and the occasional boat. For you visual types:

vietnam_overview

But first, a brief rant…

Rant

Delta Airlines: you’re awful. After waking up at 4am to take a train from Florence to reach Milan for my flight to Vietnam, I couldn’t check in at the airport. An airport customer service rep looked up my account and noticed Delta inactivated all my flights for the remainder of my trip. That’s certainly a new one. She called Delta and was put on hold immediately. (Meanwhile, she asked me if I happened to knew of a better number to reach Delta at!) After 15 minutes on hold – an eternity, when minutes are being counted – she finally reached someone who sadly couldn’t help us. Not because my situation was unusually complicated but because Delta didn’t pass 5th grade geography. Our side of the conversation went as follows: “Hello I’m calling from Milan International Airport and…yes, Milan…Meeeeelan…no, it’s in Italy.”

Ultimately I did make it to Vietnam – with only minutes to spare – but not without newfound resentment for Delta. Anyway, once I was picked up at the airport by my driver I forgot all about my troubles.

mrsamir

Food

Vietnam is often considered the culinary capital of Southeast Asia, even though Thailand tends to receive the mainstream attention. Touring the country from top to bottom will therefore offer a sampling of the country’s regional cuisine and, in turn, their culture. I’ve long felt the best way to learn a culture is through food, and so I’m excited to try everything from street stalls to upscale restaurants.

Vietnamese food can be characterized as “fresh and light”, neither of which are terms typically used to describe Asian cuisine. Their dishes are filled with piles of fresh greens and other fruits and vegetables, and the streets are packed with women transporting greens on their back, selling them, or cooking them right there on the sidewalk.

streetveggies2

Don’t worry they have meat too, although the USDA would probably have a few questions about this setup.

meat

Here are some other food highlights.

Pho

Vietnam’s most well-known dish is pho, or noodle soup with thin slices of meat and handfuls of fresh greens. It’s pronounced “fuhh” – like “fun” without the n – and not “foe”. Great pho depends on great broth, which involves many hours of cooking. Walking down the street of Hanoi smelling the aroma of pho is very tantalizing.

Even though I generally prefer other Vietnamese dishes, I certainly don’t dislike pho so my first goal here was to get a bowl. I ended up at Pho 2000, a local chain. (Yes, goofy name but sit tight.)

Simple as it may appear, it was…pho-nomenal! I was afraid the clear broth meant it’d be devoid of flavor, but not at all. This wasn’t their first time doing this.

pho

Also it turns out that then-president Bill Clinton ate here in 2000. What the pho?!

(That too marked the first time an American president visited Vietnam since the war.)

clinton

That’s now three times I’ve followed Clinton: first for beer in the Czech Republic, then hot dogs in Iceland, and now this. Where will he lead me to next?

Street Food

If food is being sold on the street, chances are I’ll be standing in line for it. Lucky for me, Hanoi is known for being one of Asia’s great cities for street food.

“Restaurant” is a bit of a stretch for what these places are. They’re more like one-room shops where the food is being cooked in the corner or in front of the shop. In Vietnam they all have a propane or charcoal stove and seating is a table or tiny plastic stools. Most feature only one or two dishes that they have perfected and sell for ridiculously low prices. It’s a wonderful thing to walk in, take a seat, and soon have delicious food placed in front of you, all without saying a word.

My favorite in Hanoi was this place, which I ate at three times:

restaurant

They serve only bun cha, very flavorful grilled meat with rice vermicelli noodles and a mountain of fresh greens. I wasn’t familiar with this dish before this trip, but I am a loyal fan now.

buncha

That bowl in the upper right isn’t rice…it’s chopped up chilies and garlic, and you know I loaded up on it. Although I had fierce garlic breath – and a churning stomach – afterwards, it was well worth it.

By the way, their “menu” is simply this poster on the wall:

menu

The conversion rate is 1 USD to 20,000 dong, so bun cha is $3, beer $0.75, and water $0.50. Yes, beer is less than $1.

It’s Communist, but…

Vietnam’s political system is communist, and there’s no confusion there.

flags

(Any place you see the Vietnamese flag (star, on the right), you’ll see the old USSR hammer and sickle flag next to it.) Their economy, however, has realized the benefits of a free market and thus capitalism is thriving here. And everyone is out to make a quick buck.

Case in point: when I landed in Vietnam I saw a non-official taxi driver approach an unsuspecting tourist asking if he wanted a taxi. The rogue taxi driver flashed him a ID card with a phony logo of the city’s official taxi company, so the tourist believed him and hopped in his taxi – his plain unmarked van, that is. Then, instead of being charged approximately 150,000 dong, the poor sucker was charged 700,000 dong.

In case you can’t tell, that poor sucker was me.

Halong Bay

I took an overnight trip to Halong Bay, a beautiful bay with more than 2000 limestone islands popping out of the water. It’s a UNESCO World Heritage site, and with some others we hopped aboard this boat:

boat

One of the islands had a small temple at the very top that you can reach, but only after climbing up 430 steps. Normally that’s doable, but in this unbelievably hot and humid weather, it was grueling. Here’s a selfie from the top:

myhead

A fun — but damp — trip. Nothing ever fully dries on a boat. Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve worn dry clothes for a month.

grouphalong

Travel Journal: Hue and Hoi An

Moving down to central Vietnam, I visited the cities of Hue and Hoi An. (By the way, I strongly recommend against anyone taking an overnight sleeper train in Southeast Asia. You won’t sleep a wink due to the constant stop-and-go, and people knock on your door every hour to sell you beer.)

Hue

Hue (pronounced “way”) was the former capital of Vietnam during its imperial years. The capital has since moved to Hanoi but Hue is still filled with palaces, pagodas, temples, and this citadel:

citadel

This large citadel also features that large flagpole…in fact, it’s the largest flagpole in Vietnam. Why are communist countries so obsessed with having huge flagpoles? That’s right, I’m looking at you North Korea.

We also visited the Thien Mu pagoda, the largest religious building in Vietnam. They enforce a strict dress code, including no showing of the knees. I would have worn my blue jeans but it’s so unbelievably hot here that I almost passed out from heat exhaustion when I tried them on for a few minutes as a test. Instead I bought these very lightweight pants that went just below my knees. Here I am, sporting them in front of the pagoda:

pagoda

Yes, they make me look irresistible. Please try to control yourselves.

This pagoda also houses the Austin vehicle that transported the monk to the site of his 1963 self-immolation in Saigon, in protest against the government’s regime. As soon as he stepped out of the car, he assumed the lotus position on the street, doused himself with gasoline, and lit himself on fire. He never moved or said anything, which led to the famous photograph. (Of note, his heart remained intact and did not burn.)

austin2

On a less morbid note, motorbikes are everywhere in Vietnam, and I mean everywhere. The country has approximately 90 million people and there are close to 40 million motorbikes…compared to only 2 million cars. The streets are congested with motorbikes, and every time you cross an intersection it’s like playing a game of chicken with 10 motorbikes driving straight at you. And they certainly cram as many things onto them as they can: children, animals, and even other motorbikes.

motorbikes

After street food, the other thing I can’t resist when I travel is getting on a motorbike. I did that this time too and got a nice tour of the city. Along the way I got a hands-on lesson how to make incense sticks and also saw an old American bomb that had been cut in half and turned into a boat.

motorbiketour

It’s too hot to talk anymore. I’m really not cut out for this weather. Luckily my hotel room has great air conditioning…and this beautiful view.

brickwindow

Hoi An

Hoi An is a beautiful and quaint city oftentimes described as “delightful” and I agree completely. It has interesting architecture and a river that lights up at night with thousands of lanterns. Here’s a panoramic shot that doesn’t do justice to the view.

panoramic

I spent four days here where I roamed their massive marketplace, bought a tailor-made suit, took a cooking class, found my favorite street food thus far in Vietnam (I may have eaten there three times), and went on a great bike ride through the city’s outskirts. On the bike ride I lucked out and was able to interact with some local farmers…who put me promptly to work:

watering

Another proudly showed off his water buffalo to me. He wanted me to stand on the animal to show how strong it was, indicating he was a successful farmer. I was a little afraid of this giant beast, but it turned out to be a gentle giant.

boof

If you have the opportunity to visit Vietnam, definitely do not skip Hoi An.